welcome.
when you are in love, the world will never matter to you..
until that love one left u dead on the ground..
so no matter what, find your stand and keep on going strong..
hover around to find the navs.
justTHREEwords
iLOVEyou*
three cheers for me.
she is the one and only
adeQ. and totally heads and heels over
Reduwan.
adeQ is 18 in the year 2008. she is currently studying in nanyang poly.
11:02 PM
Tuesday, February 19
had been a very long time i have not updated... bz laa darlings!! and yes huda, i had finally update... well... basically tis will be a short post.. or lets sae until he call me... hmm... planed to update it earlier but... hahaha.. something took my attractio awae.. had my Object Oriented Program exam todae.. it was okie.. thanx to faritz who lend me the sample paper in the bus in the morning.. it help a whole lot.. coz the paper was very2 similar... had an argument wif dear.. well.. it started like this... i received a msg frm an unknown number.. and all it saes it pssst.. can u believe it?? juz pssst.. then i ask who it was.. ect...no reply.. dear got agitated, so we rang the person up alot of time.. no answer... then out of the blue mood, this morning this idiot replyed... he was botak.. so i told dear, and dear ask me to ask laa.. which botak.. coz frm what i can remember, the only botak i noe is arul... no offence bell... it juz happen to pop out my mind that botak = arul... hahax.. then his reply oishi.. bingo!! but why he suddenly msg me?? after one whole year advoiding me, suddenly he msg me that wae?? but fuck it wif him laa kaan... i told dear.. coz i didnt intend fer him to msg me or i dun wanna lie to him either... then he got pissed off with me!! i was like what the fuck kaaan!! firstly i didnt ask him to msg me.... i didnt meet him.. the last time i meet him was when i was still full heartedly werking at oishi.. but he avoid me... and to my suprise he is wif another gerl... nvm... since we were only frenz i dun care.. if that certain fren dun wan to tok to u, u would not want to irritate him more rite?? and the person is the opposite gender frm u.. so i decided to juz shut the crap up and let him be laa... if i were to keep on calling, messaging him, he will think im some mad woman crazie over him.. so what ever rite?? anw, dear was super pissed off at me... so i was half hearted to go fer exam... but alas, i went.. sat fer it.. and it was okie... then i beg dear to meet me... but no, dear was shouting at me.. scolding me.. i was so fucked up... i juz finish an exam which i noe i can do better... and to make it worse, i was alone.. i wanted to talk to someone.. to let some steam out... i scroll and scroll my tiny contact no in hp(i dun save many ppl no, coz later he check and call, i die)... sadly.. i got no one to tok to... so instead i went to the nearest blk sat there and cry and cry... i was so fucked up.. so messed up.. i dunno what to do.. i juz felt like going to the nearest shop and buy some beer and get drunk... (but didnt coz got no $$.. if i got mayb i had bought it oredi)... after sometime... when i managed to calm myself down, i msg dear to call me.... good and bad.... good is he did call.. bad was, "nak ape??!!" translation, what u want??!!... he yelled at me that... i was so hurt... but i ask force him to meet me... rush to werk place as soon as possible only to find out he went out oredi... bu manage to meet him... we didnt spoke a werd.. went to had lunch.. i got myself a fishball soup.. yes, juz fishball and soup... no mee nothing.. i was hungry.. tummy grumbling but no appetite... then i followed him to library... i beg him everything but he juz what me away... i cant help but cry quietly by him while he played his game... i felt like boxing him.. punch him.. slap him.. but if i do, what will happen next?? will it make it better or worse... so i kept on apologies to him tho its not my fault... (can help to get a gundu so jealous like min) and finally he is okie... but then now i stat to pounder... is he the one i wanted so much.. why am i making so much effort fer him?? i mean, i went to an extend to bring him to my parents... but why him?? i got better guys rite?? i will get better guys rite?? but y him?? i feel so stupid.... fer him, i cut my relationship wif mr kinky... mr kinky was so dear to me... to treat me well.. but mayb mr kinky treats me well coz he wanna win me.. but what will happen if we were together?? will he still remain the same?? then i got H... but im not really sure bout this H tho... he dun sound that intrested in me... or is it juz me??? furthermore, i pushes my limit juzto make him happy... i dun even get what im doing... i dont think this is love... or mayb juz a small percentage...but mainly its the feeling of fear... fear of losing him... i sacrifice alot fer him... a whole lot... from friends to time and everything between it... well... i ges this is fate.... if he isthe husband that GOD had arrange fer me.. then i accept it... but i do noe, i do love him... andi shud juz keep my mind free.....
damn.. gtg.. he called.. till then.. this is a secret between u and me.. coz dear dun noe bout this blog... bye!
